Just finished Torchwood and now I'm Battlestar type depressed.

Hangover day has been all right in that I did nothing.
Went to the mall and tried on dresses, I need a good summer dress, but I can't find any. They're either too dressy, too short, to weird, bad form, or too low cut. Which comes out gross on me - I have a fantastic pink dress but it's so loud - it's cut low and it's a very loud pink. I love it - obvs, I bought it after all - but I'm looking for something more.. not boring but something that melts in a bit more. I'm explaining it wrong but I couldn't find anything. Maybe it's for the best, so I have something to look for in Vancouver.




I've been missing London something fierece lately.
It's not cause of Torchwood or anything, it's mostly been popping up when I'm doing normal things like hitting the shops or just walking in town. The other day I saw a guy walking in to a woman, he was looking the other way and was faced another so I saw the collision coming. Both twitched like you do from the surprise and slightly turned their heads towards each other, but he didn't apologize and she hardly even looked his way, not expecting one. That is extremely common in Stockholm. Hell, just before, a father drove his suitcase over my shoe and didn't turn, didn't apologize, didn't say a word, just kept going. It's insane! That would never fly in London. I mean, there are dicks there too, don't get me wrong, but despite being Europe, it's still another culture, even if the differences aren't as big. In the UK, you ALWAYS apologize. As Carin & I came to Hammersmith and changed to the Hammersmith & City line the first day this May, I was throwing something away in a bin and as I left it, I bumped into this guy. Not realizing I was in London quite yet, I expected him to either yell at me or just give me an angry look, or just keep walking. As it was my fault, I immediately apologized (Cause I'm polite!) - and he did too.

But there's other things as well, I don't know. Just being there. I miss London terribly and it's good I have a very tight budget currently cause I'd be there right now if I could afford it. Which is kinda why I don't wanna make plans for travels next year, I mumble about charter trips in Greece and Prague and Berlin and Portugal and maybe an Interrail card or maybe even Singapore, but I'm not making plans cause I - as I always am - always wanna do the opposite of what I did the second before. While I love this travel year o'mine and have had a splendid time in Barca, London and I'm sure I will have the time of my life in the US/Canada and later on at the con in London in Nov, it's also nice to be able to have a normal life and buy silly dresses on a whim and not turn every penny. And being able to go to London on a whim, just because. Hm. 2010. Yeah, we'll see. But I miss London. Miss miss miss it. Everything. And for every time I go, a weekend trip feels so short cause I wanna pencil everything in and it's usually driving me nuts. Next year I should do at least a 2-weeker, maybe in Aug or early Sep..

I would have been sooooo annoyed, had I have to pass through the Central Station during that!

oohhhhh lordie.
My body hates me today.

Yesterday was so insane, and not at the same time.
Marie thought she was gonna work saturday as her last day, but then out of the blue, someone offered to take it so suddenly it was her very last day and she obvs got a little weird/sad. I sneaked out and bought her a gorgeous silver necklace with an open heart pendant and a gorgeous pink bouquet of flowers (Marie is almost as pink lovin' as I am) and we had my pineapple cupcakes (that were a huge hit) and she stared crying and we cried a bit and we hugged and aww. Just before boss & I were to close up and go meet Marie for a proper goodbye dinner/beer, boss' bf called or texted her saying he'd gotten into the university - he's a Battlestar boss as well (in Norway, but he's Swedish) but now he's apparently gonna be a doctor. Boss got excited and checked if she'd gotten into her university - and she had. So she was a bit happy/weird cause now she's suddenly gonna be a student at 35 and she and her bf are gonna live together, finally (he was a Battlestar boss in Denmark before he moved to Norway).

And then I kinda lost it. I hate it when people leave, I'm very used to it but I really really hate it. So now they really are both leaving and I'm possibly gonna be the Commander and I guess it all just hit me cause I had to go cry a little bit. We polished my application for her position and sent it and.. yeah. So weird. If I don't get it, that's fine. I just hope that it'll be someone non-douchey who comes instead. And if I do.. that's fine too. Just hellofalot scarier. All of my Battlestar are hoping for me to get it and that's very nice of course, I'm just being all Swedish with the Jantelag tattooed on my spine, but I know boss wouldn't push for me to take over if she didn't think I could do it.

So when we met up Marie and Shveta at Vapiano for pizza & beers, we really celebrated futures; theirs and hopes for mine. So strange. So strange. Marie & I stayed out a while longer (see "boob bib" twitter) and had beers and Jack D at Temple Bar. I was dressed in my black polka dot dress and my yellow Bianco heels that I bought in Barcelona and when I swept down to the bar to order my second beer, the bartender asked me something and I was like "....yeah sure" and he came back with a Barcardi Breezer. I immediately went "NO NO NO, a BEER!" and he gave me a doubtful look and said "are you sure?". WTF. Just do as you're told, bitch. "None of that girly shit for me!", I replied. Seriously! I don't care if I prance in on a unicorn in a pink frilly princess outfit, if I say I want a beer, I want a beer! Later on, I spilled half of said beer over my dress and jacket. I get (even more) articulate when I'm drunk. (When I was sixteen or so, my friends wouldn't let me drink from anything but plastic cups at parties cause I always broke glasses and bottles. I'm better now though. A bit.)

Then I missed the night bus home by 1 minute, had to wait half an hour for one that only took me so far, but at least to my hoods, and then I found a cab there to take me the last way home.

And now I'm gonna watch Eureka.
Gonna save Torchwood till tonight - SPOIL AND DIE!

WELL'
thetre was whiskey and beers
and a nightbus that i miszse cause CUNT
nas df then taxi and walking but now I'm home at fucing n4am
'
TPU CAN'T SEE TITS ON THER ADIO

Just had a dream where I drove over the Golden Gate bridge!
askjldksfjla!! I can't believe I'm ACTUALLY GONNA DO THAT SOON.
Or, I think it's more likely that I'll walk or bike across. We'll see, it depends on what time I get to SF and what time I have to return the rental. (Reeeeally have to book the rental cars soon.) But still.

(For those of you who don't know, I have a thing for that bridge.
I don't rightly know why, but I've had since I was thirteen and've wanted to go to San Francisco since.)



Wow, it seems like ep 4 of Torchwood was devastating, I'm now sorta glad I will come home late(r) tonight so I can get both 4 + 5 in a row! Speaking of, I need to get dressed.

Long rainy workday where I wished that being manager was as 'easy' as being the Management in Carnivàle. Afterwards; sleeping on the train, cupcake baking (my kitchen looks like shiiiiit right now), Torchwood, and bath. Tomorrow is my last day working with Marie and her second-to-last.

It's so weird that it'll probably be the last I see of her. ;__;
I hate it when people leave.
She's really made the job a lot easier and hell of lot funnier and she'll be so very missed.
Poo. I'll try to get as drunk as possible tomorrow night when we'll go out to say goodbye to her, so expect drunken tweetery.

Oh, and I lost my Starbuck pin (looked like this) somewhere, most likely it's been ripped off on a bus or on a train when I've had my gym bag.
Going to bed now.

Woke up to a cranky sky, and a cranky internet, it seems.
I really can't be bothered with letting any of it ruin my fantastic week I've got going, I'm baking cupcakes today and then of course I have last night's Torchwood to watch! \o/

I love Torchwood to death because it's silly.
I'll be the first to admit not all scripts are exactly awesome but that's not why I'm watching. I'm watching because it makes me happy and excited and it's Captain Jack Harkness and sexy Gwen and you know, all that, but this? This that we are getting now?



IT'S FUCKING BRILLIANT.
And not in a "Ianto mocking Owen when the phone's are not working" way, but in a actual, qualitywise way. This? IS GOOD SHIT. Seriously. I'm so stunned I have no words besides HOLY WOW GUYS THIS, THIS IS SO AWESOME AND WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE GONNA DO WHEN IT GOES AWAY? And I mean, what ARE they gonna do now what with ( and spoilers for ep 2.. )

All righty!
It wasn't all yays to get up this morning but now that I have breakfast in my tummy, promised Leverage interviews on the way and gym before temping in another Battlestar, I'm in a quite good mood! Yes, I'm a bit sad you don't seem to have checked out the post I made last night and I get it, long post about weird foreign movies, right? But please keep it until a rainy days when you're bored or something. These movies are so awesome. Fact. Cause I said so!


Now for ( yesterday's One Photo/Hour )

OK, gonna get going soon. Feels a bit weird to be wearing heels to gym clothes (lmao) but I think I can pull it off.
It's the new hot thang, DYK!

I don't even remember why I wanted to make this post.
I just started think about Swedish movies and started to think about my favs. These are some of them, not all and I'm not saying this is the very best, but my favs. I'm probably forgetting some, which is why I didn't wanna rank them. I hate ranking anyways. Say "Top 3 blahblah and GO?" to me, you'll get teh evil eye.

Most DVDs in Sweden come out with english subs; if you against all odds are interested in any of the movies, let me know and I can help with hooking you up (probably cheaper than Amazon, if they by any chance would have it).



( SWEDISH MOVIES ANNO LIKES! bork yeah! )

It's command center Anno in my living room today with US guide books, phones (yes plural; regular + old cell + new cell), camera, wallet, notebook + laptop. The plan for the day has been to just plan the US, with breaks for laundry, food, a jog and book my flight home to Luleå.

Along with that, I'm having a special photo day that used to be popular back in the day when there were more photo journals around; One Photo Per Hour. I'm posting them every hour on my swedish blog and I'm gonna put them all here at the end of the day as well (in one post to avoid spamming your Flists). It's fun, but JEEZ LOUISE the time goes so much faster when you really have a steady appointment every hour. Strange.

It's actually going pretty well;
I finished the San Diego guide and googled some LA shooting locations (mainly Buffy/Angel), I'm almost done with laundry (gonna get it as soon as I'm finished here), I booked the flight and I've even had lunch! It's so frakking complicated to fly with animals (at least in Sweden) so I don't know yet if I made it to the flight I want to, it depends on if they have room for the cats or not so right now I'm in flight limbo until I hear either yay or nay from them. :/

Gonna go get said laundry now and then start on the LA guide.

WE ARE COMING.

That was fucking mad brilliant. And also, very gay.
(And I don't even mean Jack/Ianto) I love it so much. ♥

Work went fast, was good, laughed, did shit. Blabla.
Gym was nice, lots of eyecandy today, went fast, had a sauna. Blabla.
Met J on the platform, talked shit all the way home, read my LA guidebook even though I'm not finished with San Diego yet. Blabla.

Gonna have me some unhealthies now to totally ruin my workout and finally finish s2 of Carnivàle.
Or at least get closer to it. OH smercy AREN'T YOU PROUD OF ME.
(Now do as I say and go watch Leverage!)

As I was googling Highway 1 I randomly found a swedish photo blog/site by a guy from my hometown. His photos are STUNNING, everything from our (not so) awesome hockey team to gigs to travel photos. I imagine myself all right at photography, a bit better than most I suppose (IDK if that's true or not but I do) but if it's something I really feel bad not doing, it's develop my photography interest more than I currently am. I'm not bad but I could be better, that's for sure! Anyways, amazing stuff there. Here's photos of people on the Lule River in the winter. I usually take that bridge (Bergnäsbron, "Bergnäs Bridge") when I've been in town and am headed home to Mommy Superstar's.

aww. Now I wanna go;
1. home for more than just 3 days to leave the cats
2. buy the new camera NOW NOW NOW and buy lots of fun expensive toys and play around and not think of 1. work 2. trips and 3. anything else boring that takes a lot of time and leaves me exhausted
3. bed

Going with #3 for now.

I just made the fucking inanest icon for moviedouche.
IDEK. lmao

The FRAKKING neighbor cat was up on the balcony rail - with Joe & Zlatan on the balcony!
This bugs me to fucking bits. I don't want that stupid cat near them, cause she's an outdoors cat and they aren't. I don't know if she'd give them any disease, probably not, but I'm mostly scared they'll fight and get hurt and I'm a bit frustrated of what to do - again, she's an outdoor cat. They can only keep so much eye on her. But WTF I don't want her on my frakking balcony! I don't have my balcony netted cause I don't need to - Zlatan and Joe keep on the ground, happy just peaking out and they LOVE being out there. I can't fucking be around watching out for her either!

You know those days where you wake up from a dream of adventures with the Doctor and Captain Jack by bells softly ringing from a chime somewhere outside your window, a kitty buffing on your elbow half an hour before the alarm goes off, and all that's really missing is a few birds to dress you?

Those mornings are not that bad! :)

Hm.
Laundry, dishes, cleaning up the kitchen. Been a nice "nothing day", as I like to call them.
Started to watch The Hours and realized I'd seen it before and didn't very much care to again.
Watched some Carnivàle instead. Thinking of rewatching Leverage before s2 starts up.
And do a picspam. I should probably finish the Swedish Movies post I've been working on first though.

Tea, candles, sandwiches & tea right now. Or, a while ago.
I should vacuum, but probably not at 11pm. Tomorrow morning?

Extra love to frakking AWESOME jeebs83 who picked me up a free week pass to a gym in Vancouver!
HOW AWESOME IS THAT. ♥

Happy 4th of July, Americanos!
I have no fireworks for ya but well the JUNE PICSPAM (with boobage);


( June 2009 )

I don't use the "content" mood tag lightly.
I'm generally always unsatisfied, there is always something that's missing. It's called life. It's OK. I think it's pretty impossible to be completely satisfied. The more you get, the more you want. When I first moved to Stockholm almost 7 years ago and worked for $10/hour, I could afford my rent, my bills, food and then ONE luxury item/month. My luxury item I mean one CD, one DVD or one time go out drinking (but not too much) with friends. Despite that, I can't remember being unhappy. I liked my job and I love my apartment and my new kittens.

Then I got another job where I was actually paid decently and realized how fucking scammed I'd been at my previous job. Now I could afford DVDs and clothes and everyday stuff. Later, got my current job and go even more money. I've been saving money for the last year, and this year I've been in London & Barcelona, I have my 6 week adventure in US/Canada and another trip to London in November. For someone who's not exactly grown up poor, but def with a tight budget, that's amazing. And the coolest part is that I'm making it all by myself. I marvel at my own adulthood sometimes, I feel like a teenager inside constantly. Some people have even more money than I do. They have so much clothes they don't even wear everything (alien concept to me, how can you buy something and then not wanna wear it immediately?!) and yet they want more. And if it's not material, it's personal. Want love, want child, want marriage, want it to last, want everything to go not bad.

It's not strange things to want. Whatever your image of happiness and success is, of course you want it!
It's all relative and it's impossible to get full of life.

But it's very possible to still be content at times. Specially in the summer, if you're me.
I'm so happy in the summertime cause I'm really in love with summer, and I'm happy that I'm happy because I know there is a winter full of SAD:ing coming, as it always is, and I'm determined to enjoy every little piece of the warm, bright days. I never complain about the heat, even if it can make me uncomfortable. Right now it's so warm it feels like you're constantly in this warm blanket and I just gotta love it. It'd be better if the AC was working on the buses and trains a bit more, but I refuse to blame it on the weather. And I'm so content right now. I spent an hour on the sunbed (I love late afternoon tanning when it's not all up in your face) and now I'm just in my most comfy linen pants and a tunic and it's friday night, I'm drinking lemonade and I'm just so fucking CONTENT. Fuck more fun and fantastic things going on someplace else, fuck my dirty kitchen, fuck my need to finish the travel plans, fuck dinner, I don't care. It's warm, I'm chilled and relaxed and it's all all right. It's the best feeling in the world. ♥

um, worked.
Had the oddest lunch; 1/4 quorn pizza, cherry tomatoes, cheese bread, mini ricemeal thingie. And an apple.
Left early after I finished the Aug schedule, rescheduled Body Combat for sunday.

In the morning I accidentally erased Cort & Fatboy.
Thank god for Brock (new cell) and his magic having the internet in him!

um
Was warm, is nice, buses and trains with no AC, not nice.
Went grocery shopping.
Insert shimmery fangirling is *chorus* Swedish Summer *chorus*

and yeah
um
tired, bed.
Temping at another Battlestar tomorrow, but just for like 5 hours so it should go by like that.

This week is so weird.